What I Had Lost

I thought I’d get back

What I had lost.

I thought Fate would be kind.

I believed time repeated itself

And that I could be young,

Innocent, once again.

Travelled to that world

To the place I’d dreamed of going.

To a girl I may still be in love with,

Whose touch, a mere graze,

Could caress away my worries.

Travelled to the place I could see.

The heat that I could feel,

The smell that I could perceive,

Thinking, hoping, believing

That that Me was still alive,

Just dormant till then,

And that Her was still the same.

Returned to the emptiness,

The deathly silence of my prison cell,

Having learnt a lesson.

One that may not

Have made me wiser,

But one that was thrust into my face,

Jabbed into my heart

Like a branding iron.

They are fools, who say

Friends arrive only in times of need.

Fools, who believe

Friends are to be ‘beckoned’

In times of trouble.

Friends…

Beings, fragments of your soul

Parts of your body.

Present in times of need,

In times of pain,

Of sadness,

And in times of joy,

Of jubilance,

Of pleasure.

Multiplying happiness,

Diminishing, annihilating sorrow.

Always there,

Need them or not,

Organs, functioning to keep you alive,

To keep you healthy.

I lost a friend yesterday.

Or maybe I never had her

To begin with…